The Anchor Babies

Who is The Anchor Babies?

The Anchor Babies are a Latin and reggae-influenced rock band from Los Angeles, California.

www.myspace.com/theanchorbabiesla

The Anchor Babies

Official Dossier

The Threat

Wherever they see borders, they smash them like twigs. Whether it's borders between nations or musical genres, neither one stands a chance against the force of nature known simply as The Anchor Babies: An elite special operatives unit comprised of some of the most uncompromising musicians from Argentina, Colombia, and Oregon. Drawing from a wide and varied arsenal, The Anchor Babies are known to be proficient in a number of subversive musics including, but not limited to, South American rhythms like cumbia, mambo, songo, reggae, ska, reggaeton, as well as old school punk rock, post-punk, funk, jazz, and of course, good old rock 'n roll. Considered to be armed and extremely dangerous, The Anchor Babies are on a mission to tear down boundaries that exist between people in any form they find them, and promote unity among everyone. Obviously, they must be stopped.

Their invasion began inconspicuously enough: a house show in Los Angeles one day in September. The dancing, singing along, and general enjoyment that took place in all present set the stage for future concerts, or “fiestas de té,” as the members themselves refer to their high-energy, love-soaked rallies. Since then, many more “fiestas de té” have taken place, and our sources report that even more are planned.

Recently, a piece of propaganda was discovered, detailing The Anchor Babies' truly sinister motives. This document, in the form of a compact disc called “Los Cagados Unidos,” encourages such dangerous actions as thinking for oneself, and questions such long-held beliefs as rock bands must limit themselves to just a single musical style, and coercive, plutocratic capitalism is the best political system possible. We cannot allow such un-patriotic activities to continue.

What Can be Done

It is your job to stop this cancer from spreading. A number of actions can be taken on your part to help contain the grave threat The Anchor Babies present to national security. Show up to one of their concerts, or “ fiestas de té” and protest. Bring as many of your friends, relatives, neighbors, co-workers, co-parishioners, whoever you can rally to the cause of silencing these infidels. Bring picket signs, slogans to yell, and don't forget your dancing shoes. The more people we can get to protest The Anchor Babies, the more power we will have.

Pick up a copy of “Cagados Unidos” and listen to it thoroughly, to understand where these psychos are coming from. Then burn copies of it for everyone you know, and insist they listen to it. The best way to defeat an enemy is to know him like you know yourself. Write reviews of the CD on blogs, request record stores carry it, anything that can expose this filth for what it truly is.

The Future is in Your Hands

The Anchor Babies must be stopped at all costs. Are you up to the challenge?

For more information on what you can do to help, contact:

Brendan

losanchorbabies@gmail.com

Further reading: www.myspace.com/theanchorbabiesla